There’s imposter Kirk
You can tell by the scratches
Fuse ‘em together

Those maraca hands
Needed a little serum
They found time travel

Kirk wrestled a teen
In spandex but fixed nothing
The kid had to go

McCoy’s old flame died
But he doesn’t know it yet
She wants Mrs. Dash

Now it’s Captain Kirk
Fighting the godlike powers
Of four shiny eyes

That’s Christopher Pike
He was the captain before
That’s no illusion