Jackie plots a scheme to profit from a friend’s band. Newton learns a lesson about dogs.

More “Newton & Jackie” episodes here!

Newton worries over swine flu hysteria. Jackie wants out.

Newton tries to whistle with his fingers. Jackie dreams about a dead relative.

Jackie dismisses a scene from “The Three Stooges.” A big-time CEO makes Newton smile.

Jackie tells Newton about what she heard on “Coast to Coast AM.” Newton snaps under pressure.

I’m excited to introduce my new weekly (hopefully) Web cartoon, “Newton and Jackie.”

A site called xtranormal.com offers an amazing text-to-animation movie-making service. I’ll be using my weekly Tweets to inspire these visits with Newton and Jackie. In our pilot, “Call Me a Cynic,” Newton says his mattress is giving him weird dreams, and Jackie makes a tough decision about Twitter.

I hope you enjoy these conversations with myself.